He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
