he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
