i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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