how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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