yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
