You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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