im gay
i know
yea but for you.
My balls are so social today.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
God I need to hump something, right now.
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