If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
PS: I just woke up from my shower
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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