remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Randomize
