New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
