I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
