i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
