Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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