jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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