My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Let's paint friendship bongs
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I just want nice things and good sex
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I wear drunk well.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
