I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
you mean i was at the winter classic?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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