What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize
