my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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