i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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