Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Randomize
