While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
