I bet he comes in French.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
