I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
