i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
one two three fourrrrnication!
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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