good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Everclear isn't food dammit
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
