therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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