hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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