he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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