Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
