How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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