yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize