Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Randomize
