I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
