i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize