LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
