Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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