Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
