I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
