Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Randomize
