You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
