Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
