I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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