Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
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