His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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