What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
