I hate your face
I think I am morally bankrupt
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
