I seem to have left my pride at pride
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Even my vagina gasped.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
