Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
