I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
