Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
