I heard we made out
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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